Thursday, April 23, 2009

You Can't Choose your Family!


I have taken up doing some family research. I've always been interested to learn more about the personal lives of my relatives. So far, I've dug up some interesting things...some of which had long been pushed away and forgotten.
My Great-Great-Great-Great Grandfather Seth Wick immigrated from Germany to Sweden and became a royal guard for either King Oscar (most likely because of dates, right) or his son King Charles. He held this position until he was accidentally shot in the hip. After the injury, he was given the game keeper (keeper of the estate) job at one of the king's hunting estates.
He eventually came to America to live with his son who had already come to America. Seth spent a lot of time at the hotel his son owned and became so disgusted with the lack of manners displayed by Americans that he returned to Sweden. So maybe that's why I'm really into manners? :P
And on a less enthusiastic note...I found out why my Great-Grandfather Milton refused to acknowledge our German heritage after he came home from World War II. Apparently, a very distant relative to our branch of the family was a decorated pilot in the Luftwaffe (German Air Force). Helmut Wick was the youngest pilot to rise in rank as quickly as he did and had the most air victories (56 total) in the early part of the war. He was presented with the Oak Leaves (highest military honor) and the Knight's Cross by Hitler himself for his victories. He was only 25 and was shot down in a firefight with a British pilot off the coast of England in 1940. His body was never recovered and the other pilot was also killed.
My Great-Grandfather was very upset about the fact that someone with our shared ancestory could have been involved on such a high level within the German cause. Milton had survived Normandy and the Battle of the Bulge and after witnessing the death and destruction did not want to have anything to do with Germany. He had seen first hand what Hilter and his followers had done to Europe and didn't want to remotely be a part of any of it. I don't blame him for banishing that part of our heritage, though distant...it was just to close for him.
We had always wondered why he had such a reaction, and apparently we found the reason why. I'm not sure if Helmut shared the ideals of the Nazi party or if he just followed his passion for flying. I really hope he was just and average guy with an interest in aircraft and had not bought into the ideas that later led to some of the greatest crimes ever committed.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

I smell a blockbuster... Brit On A PLANE!!!!

A peaceful flight from Wichita to Jacksonville…



Until a terrorist Brit whips up some poisonous tea that leaves all passengers gasping for air and for more airline peanuts.

In comes Samuel L. Jackson with the one weapon that strikes fear in all blue blooded Brits…dental instruments!

“Get that mother-*&@$*&$% Brit off this mother-$%*&^#@ plane!”


We’re low budget…so it ended a lot like the BOSTON TEA PARTY!!! The End!




We Like Booze...

We like Booze
(inspired by “We Like Sportz” by Lonely Island)

Hello,
Hi, Do you wanna go to a party with me?
No, I’m drinkin’.
O, I almost forgot, I'll be right there.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
From shooting beers, to the jello-shot.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
Captain, Captain, Captain, Natty, Vodka, Schnapps.
The Pre-Game is startin, everyone is here,
I got my snacks, my friends and a beer.
Just two normal guys hangin out, having fun,
Right Guy number two?
Yea Guy number one.
"B" to the "E" to the "E" to the "R", Is all I drink 'cause I'm the man.
If my beer pong team loses I'll be mean all night
If you tell me to relax we'll get in a fight.
Playing games with girls is a pain, They don't know the rules, there's no time to explain.
Single, Double, Bounce out, Score
For the celebration I'll shoot my gun.
I Like my friend he's a real guys guy, He's not a loud mouth like that asshole John.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
From Budweiser, to Boone’s Farm.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
Captain, Captain, Captain, Natty, Vodka, Schnapps.
Now when I say booze, you say chug.
booze-chug, booze-chug
When I say puking, you say sucks.
puking-sucks, puking-sucks
I drink whisky because I like the taste,
You think it's bitter, but I think it's great.
I also drink whiskey and mix it with gin,
Don't believe me? Smell our farts.
We're real men, and we like booze,
If you say that we're not then we'll see you in the garage.
I'm beer pong team captain, and I choose you,
I'm the other team captain and I choose you, too.
We steal the ball, and we're off to the races, Then scare the other team with our mad dog faces.
Like:What, What, What, What, What, What, What, What, What, What, What, What.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
From the pre-gaming jokes, to the throw-up show.
We Like Booze and we don't care who knows,
Captain, Captain, Captain, Natty, Vodka, Schnapps.
Throw me the cup,
Now toss me the beer,
Now feed me the shot,
Now give me the shot.